My Love Forgive Read online

  Neither of us was necessarily telling the truth all this time, but both of us wanted the same exact thing. Love.

  Damian just couldn’t let me go now after all of this.

  “It’s not chilly in here, you know.” I did my best attempt at a sunny smile. “I could slip under the covers and stay warm—especially if you join me.”

  “Mmm, that’s tempting but not yet. Put these on, Risa.”

  I hesitated. “Why?”

  “Because I want you to.”

  His gaze met mine, opaque but watchful. I tightened my hold on the jeans before abruptly standing up. I made quick work of changing, aware of Damian’s admiring stare the entire time. Desire pulsed and I was breathless by the time I finished.

  Damian reached out and touched my hand. He pulled me closer. “I’m going to give you a choice, Risa.”

  “I’m listening.”

  “Twenty minutes outside. If I can’t find you then you decide if we stay here or you go back home. If I find you then I lock you up in my room for the next two days. After that we’ll go home.”

  I licked my lips, heartbeat thrumming fast with a dizzying mixture of excitement and nervousness. “Then what?”

  Damian cocked his head, questioning light in his gorgeous eyes.

  Clarifying, I asked, “What happens once we go home?”

  “What do you want to happen?”

  “I want to still be with you. Either way.” Damian didn’t answer, merely waited for me to spell out my real question. “Are you going to still stay with me when I win?”

  He grinned and cupped my chin, giving it a light squeeze. “You’re so confident you’re going to win. You know I won’t let that happen.”

  Desire coiled low in my belly. His confidence, as always, was an aphrodisiac. It brought out the flirt in me. “Then why are you doing it?”

  “For you. So you’ll realize it too.”

  * * *

  A few minutes after that Damian had led me downstairs and wrapped me in my heavy coat. He then wrapped a watch around my wrist, explaining that the timer would go off in twenty minutes. Again he reminded me that if he hadn’t caught me by then, I’d win. Otherwise I was his.

  His completely.

  Damian then pushed me out the door and growled, “Go.” The prey in me responded to the predator in him. I’d taken off and had been running ever since.

  I’d left sight of the main house about ten minutes ago. The brief glimpse I’d had of it proved my suspicion that it was indeed a mansion. Three stories of stone, gracefully pitched roof, circular driveway with a fountain in the middle, and large beds indicative of gorgeous landscaping during warm months, the house was a French architect lover’s dream.

  Now I was deep in the woods with nothing but bare trees to observe my mad flight. Leaves crunched loudly beneath my booted feet. Ragged breath shot curls of white steam. I’d never considered myself a slouch when it came to fitness but this frantic run forced me to reevaluate my beliefs.

  I came to a stumbling halt. Resting my hand on a tree, rough bark digging into my bare hand, I sucked in large gasps of air. Although it burned going in, it felt so good to be able to stop. I just hoped that I’d lost Damian long enough to pay for this break.

  Glancing at the watch, I saw I only had about four minutes left. I looked around me in a flash. Nothing. Confidence built. I was actually going to win. Following up on that, I felt several sharp pangs of disappointment.

  It would be so much easier to go along with staying here if I didn’t have a choice.

  I froze.

  Damian was a brilliant man. Frighteningly so. Did he know that’s how I really felt all along? Is that why he set this up for me? So I’d realize it too?

  I heard a branch snap menacingly in the ragged space of my heartbeat and gasping breaths. Whirling around, I searched for the source. Nothing.

  That had to be Damian. No one else is out here, right?

  I pushed off the tree and took off in a full sprint. I could barely hear anything above the sound of my messy escape. Unfortunately, my mind couldn’t be silenced. What started as a game with Damian took on an uglier cast as my imagination sped headlong into darker territory.

  I assumed it was just Damian and me out here. What if it wasn’t? There could be hunters out here, lurking to kill sweet deer and finding me instead. Or what if there were big cats that didn’t appreciate me tramping all over their hunting grounds? Bears. Bears that I woke up when I tried to cough up my lung.

  Fuck this noise! I’m out!

  Panicked by my thoughts, I changed direction and zig-zagged back towards the house instead of away. Safety was there. Not out here. I didn’t even care about checking the watch or anything else. I just concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other and hauling tail back.

  That’s when Damian stepped out from behind a tree.

  39

  DAMIAN

  Risa would’ve run me down if I didn’t grab her first. She let out a shrill scream. Her eyes were glassy with fear and she was gasping so fast it was obvious she could barely breathe.

  “Risa!”

  She locked her gaze onto me. Recognition filtered. “Damian?”

  Before I could answer Risa lunged towards me and latched on. She climbed up my body like an adorable monkey and wound her arms around my neck.

  I felt the tremors shaking her small body, tremors that went beyond her ragged breathing. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

  “I…I…was so…I…oh God!”

  Worry gripped me. This was not the intended outcome of the exercise. I went to set her down but she clamped all four limbs on me tighter. “Risa, what happened?” I studied the forest around us. No one could’ve crossed into the property without my system alerting me.

  Looking over my shoulder, I remember seeing a cropping of large boulders about 50 yards away. It would make a good spot to rest. And to take cover if needed.

  Violence had not touched my life on these shores but generations of violence had imprinted deeply on my instincts. The gun in my jacket and the other holstered on my ankle brought me a measure of comfort. I never went anywhere without at least one weapon on my person.

  Fortune always favored the prepared. My guardians drilled that into me from an early age, even going so far as to train me for the possibility of kidnapping, assault, and assassination attempts as soon as I was old enough to hold a gun. I was a crack shot by the age of nine and had only gotten better since then.

  Risa startled in my arms. I reached up and turned off the watch’s alarm. Risa melted immediately against me. With heightened awareness of my surroundings, I walked us into the hard shelter. I couldn’t see anything but trees or hear anything but the wind.

  I reached into my pocket and checked my phone. Nothing tripped the system and everything was still live and intact. Risa and I were the only ones out here except for wildlife.

  I leaned back against the rock and petted Risa’s back while she repeated in a whisper, “I’m so glad it was you!” over and over again.

  I didn’t press her for details. I just waited until she calmed enough to pull back and look at me. An embarrassed smile skated across her luscious mouth. “I’m sorry I freaked out.”

  It couldn’t have been too bad since she apologized. Still I needed to know. “What happened?”

  “Oh, you know. I let my imagination run away from me.”

  “Your imagination, huh? What did your imagination make happen?” I paid close attention to her answer just in case it wasn’t Risa’s imagination. Technology, while great, could fail and I knew that better than anyone.

  Her fingers tightened on my shoulders. “I heard a branch snap.”

  “And then?”

  “And then I was sure a hunter, mountain lion, and bear were all out to get me. Given another minute I would’ve been convinced the Jersey Devil lived out here too—even though we’re far from Jersey.”

  I couldn’t help but smile a little. Relief appeared. “A
ll that in my woods, Risa?”

  She ducked her head. “I know. Stupid, right?”

  “This imagination gets you into trouble more often than not, don’t you think? Monsters in my woods…me giving you hateful looks while I’m making love to you…hmm. What else will you come up with? I should be scared of your imagination, Risa.”

  “Okay, now you’re making fun of me.”

  I kissed her red mouth softly and much too quickly. “Just a little.” I loved the look of desire in her dark gaze. She always responded so beautifully to me. It was addictive to have this woman want me the way she did.

  “Damian?”

  “Yes, little girl?”

  “You caught me before the alarm went off.”

  Hello. What do we have here?

  I nodded, gaze boring into hers and ferreting out all her delicate, delicious emotions. If anything, Risa’s desire seemed to grow sharper with my perusal.

  “I guess that means you win.”

  She was so shy in her capitulation. I couldn’t resist teasing Risa. “You guess?”

  “You won.” Her teeth bit into her plump lip. Chagrin colored the notes of her words. “I would’ve won if I hadn’t freaked out.”

  Humor tickled my senses at the utter wrongness of her statement. “Really?”

  “Yes, really. You only caught up to me because I was running back to the house.”

  I smiled. Sweet girl. She had no clue that the watch on her wrist pinged her location back to me every step of the way. Risa was never going to win. I’d keep that to myself though because I was a secretive bastard that way.

  “So now what, Damian?”

  I tilted my head. I recognized the sultry look in her eyes. Things were about to get infinitely interesting.

  40

  RISA

  “So now what?” I’d asked more than a little flirtatiously.

  Now that I was truly safe and truly caught, freedom rang right through me. I didn’t have to worry about Damian’s ruthlessness and my reaction to it. I didn’t have to think about running away anymore. I could just surrender to being here with him.

  It felt fantastic.

  Looking up into his jaw-dropping handsome face, I felt my entire body melt for him. I could be here with Damian without guilt. Without fear.

  I now understood that Damian wanted me with him. He loved me like I loved him.

  Euphoria. It began as a tingle in my fingers and toes. Then it traveled up my limbs and throughout my veins. Everything felt lighter, like I could float away if it wasn’t for him holding me so securely.

  I looked at Damian with new eyes. Since I didn’t have to be afraid anymore it meant I could focus on the parts of us which had always been. Damian had always taken care of me. He cooked for me, undressed me, washed my clothes, dropped off and picked up my dry cleaning, read to me…all of his free time had been devoted to me.

  How could I not see that was his way of showing me love?

  My fingers trailed across the high cheekbones before tracing over his slashing brows. His eyes, God his eyes! I loved being held like this, high enough to be face to face, just so I could look deeply in his gorgeous, unusual eyes.

  Heaven and Hell. Love and Hate. Man and Woman. Everything in the world I’d ever be or need is right here with Damian.

  Why was I ever scared to begin with out in the woods and before, back in our “real” lives? Was it because my imagination couldn’t imagine this? Take away the kinky sex and the domination games we played as easily as breathing, what was the real truth hiding behind Risa Kelly?

  Was it that I couldn’t believe such a brilliant handsome man could ever really love someone like me?

  I knew my flaws. I’d never had a relationship last longer than a few dates. That was normal to me. Dinner, movie, sex. Not always in that order. I loved being around men who challenged me, but once the challenge wore off so did I.

  Once they liked me more than I liked them I was gone. And I wanted to like them, but no matter how nice they were I just couldn’t feel anything deeper.

  Until Damian Black.

  Before Damian I was unable to do real intimacy. Hell, I’d argue I still wasn’t very good at it even now. I fell back on old habits and ran away Friday night because I was afraid of hearing Damian say to me what I’d said to so many others.

  And then there’s Gretchen.

  Seeing her at Damian’s feet that night had made me sick with dread. It had only confirmed what I already knew from the first time Damian stepped foot in my office. Somehow, someway I knew he was the one who had the power to break through the walls I’d erected my entire adult life.

  I should’ve run but I didn’t. Instead, I played moth to his intense flame. Utterly masochistic to even a crumb of affection I understood, I’d suffered because I was reading the story completely wrong.

  But now was different.

  Now I could bend a little and trust in his love. All it took was a kidnapping, a chain, and a run through the woods.

  “How’s your knee, Risa?”

  Blinking in confusion, it took me a few moments to realize what Damian had just asked me. “My knee? It’s fine.”

  Damian tilted his head slightly. “Are you sure? It was an ugly scratch.”

  “I know.” I smiled. “But it doesn’t even hurt.”

  “If it’s not your knee, then tell me why you look like you’re in pain.”

  One day ago I wouldn’t have answered his question with full candor. I would’ve deflected it with a wide smile and changed the subject.

  “Because I wish I could’ve let you love me from the beginning.”

  Surprise shot through his gaze. To his credit, Damian didn’t try to hide it. “You see that now.”

  “I do.”

  His arms tightened on my thighs. “It’s not easy for me, Risa,” Damian began before stopping.

  When he fell silent for so long I asked gently, “What?”

  “Telling you what I feel. I’ve shown you my feelings for a long time and needed it to be enough. But I know it wasn’t for you. I’ve never…felt…like this for anyone before.”

  My heart raced in joy. “Never?”

  “Never.”

  “Neither have I.”

  An arrogant look entered his mesmerizing gaze. “I know.”

  “How do you know—” Damian cut me off in mid-question. His mouth seized mine and kissed all the thoughts right out of my head. Too quickly I was moaning loudly, pushing my soft body against his muscled frame as I rocked against him faster.

  Damian threaded his hand through my hair, yanking my head back to kiss, nibble, and lick his way up my throat. My breath exploded in the cold air. The roughness of his caresses immediately took me to that addictive pleasure-pain line.

  I cried out his name when his teeth sank into the sensitive skin between neck and shoulder. Damian pushed me against the boulder. I heard more than felt the roughness on my back. Impractically, I wished I’d worn a fluttery skirt so he could plunge right into me.

  Damian plundered my mouth, drawing dizzy moans from deep inside me. I writhed against him, whispering how much I wanted and needed him. Now.

  Instead of teasing me and dragging out my lust, Damian hurriedly set me down. My legs wobbled. He dropped to one knee and lifted my foot onto his thigh. I watched through a slit gaze as he effortlessly undid my boot laces before repeating it on the other.

  Normally he’d set them neatly, side by side, before slowly pulling down my pants and folding them. Damian tossed my boots and then yanked down my jeans. I barely stepped out of them before he roughly pulled my panties off too.

  Damian’s feral smile made me quiver as he stared at my mound. His cheeks hollowed with hunger. I shyly widened my stance. He needed no further invitation.

  My low moans travelled far in the still air. Damian spread me open with one hand while his tongue licked me long and deep, paying special attention to my clit every few licks. When I would’ve lifted my leg on his shoulder, Da
mian slapped my thigh hard.

  “I didn’t tell you to move, Risa.”

  His thuggish growl nearly threw me over the edge. I brought my fisted hands to my mouth and beautifully suffered the teasing strokes and kisses he rained down on my pussy.

  “Does this feel good?”

  I panted my affirmation.

  “Tell me.”

  Oh God. I didn’t know if I could put it into words just how good it felt to feel his warm tongue flick over my sensitive flesh, to feel the tender scrape of his stubble cheeks against my inner thighs.

  His mouth slowed. Frantic that Damian might stop, I babbled, “It feels so good!”

  He pulled back despite my strangled whine. I looked down at him and saw his mouth wet with me. My legs buckled. Reaching for him, I peppered tiny kisses all over his lips and begged him to “Please don’t stop!”

  Damian chuckled, obviously pleased at my enthusiasm. He rewarded me by slipping one finger inside me. I rocked shamelessly against his hand, loving the way his knuckles felt against my overly sensitive clit.

  Without prompting, I moaned, “Oh God, Damian! It’s not even close to being enough but it still feels so good. I just want to come over and over again.”

  He didn’t reply but he did slip another finger to join the first. I leaned back against the rock and arched my hips up, hoping to tempt him to resume kissing me the way I loved.

  “Tell me what you want, little girl.”

  I should’ve known that somehow he’d know exactly what I thought. For someone who liked me being submissive to him, Damian definitely liked to hear me assert myself verbally. So I did.

  “Lick my pussy until I come.” The order came out with an imperious air.

  His hand slowed and a frown settled on his gorgeous face. Despite being on one knee for me, Damian exerted his dominance quite easily. “What did you say to me, Risa?”

  My hands fluttered helplessly. “Please! Please lick my pussy until I come.”

  He studied me with narrowed eyes for several uncomfortable moments. A sadistic light entered his gaze. “Very well, Risa.”